My Very Spiffy Spring Break

Well, for starters, I am going to drink coffee EVERY SINGLE DAY. And because of that I will be in a good mood and not imagine tearing off all of Barbie’s limbs one by one. Not that I feel that way anyway. Because that would be weird. I was thinking about attempting to take over the world during spring break, but then when I thought about it, it seemed like a lot of work. Between the whole fighting the Dark Lord thing, having to deal with the hobbits’ bottomless appetites, emaciated wraiths throwing themselves at you, and don’t even get me started on the One Ring Of Power. Like seriously, what happens when one gets all old and fat and they have to cut the One Ring of Power off because it is cutting off one’s circulation? Really, who thought that up?

I have to do a multitude of projects this Spring Break. It’s like “Oh, here’s one week of vacation! …but we’re going to give you so much homework that you won’t be able to wiggle your toes!” –insert favorite swear word here-

Today (the beginning of Spring Break), I am going to French Symposium to compete with other geeky kids from all around here. I’m going to say a poem and prose (en français, of course). I’m very nervous/excited because the winner wins a trip to France. Sacre chat!

I will probably sleep like a sloth this break, because I am exhausted and do not want to turn into a zombie. Because that would be bad. Like, just a little bit. I will probably go to Walmart and set up a scavenger for some random soul, or some other abnormal, yet amazing thing.

In the end, my break will probably consist of me nourishing my coffee obsession, working and watching NCIS with mi padre, learning to drive (FINALLY!!!!!!!) and maybe reading a few good books (i.e. rereading Phantom of the Opera, Scarlet Pimpernel, or starting Grapes of Wrath for next year) and spending time with my best friend (in hopes some of her goodness rubs off on me).

Parenthesis have attacked my paper. I shall now have to go on Crusade to destroy them. And eat. As Miracle Max once said, “True love is the greatest thing in the world! Except for a nice MLT – mutton, lettuce, and tomato sandwich. They’re so perky – I love that.”